Old things

I tend to keep some items around for a very long time. Not many things, and not even things that have any kind of value, just random objects. Like my black coat. I've had it for over a decade now, but I rarely wear it. I have nicer coats and now a warmer climate, so it doesn't get a lot of use. I wore it the other day and it had something in the pocket. I took it out, some small papers from a public notepad. On those little pieces of paper was a poem I'd written when I was first in college, so between 9 and 10 years ago. I was very into free verse at the time. Here is that poem.

Dreams?

Lost.

Ambition?

Abandoned.

Courage

taken

Hope

spent

Love?

... theatrical farce.

Crossroads, with map, directions, and no fuel.

Got up when I fell down, hit my head and was knocked unconscious.

There is no such thing as my turn.

I resent work when it is tough because of stress and when it is easy because it is unfulfilling

and then I go home alone to be happy in my independence.

Glad to be lonely because then I'm the only one whining.

Men?

Impossible.

Women?

Worse, lovers, friends,

And I get lost in this drive to be successful

And this is not about me.

I cry because 30,000+ people commit suicide every year

because people too weak to go forward were trampled by those too busy to look back

Or people who didn't die and won't live

and you tell me the other option.

We created this culture

just like the guns that kill us

and the pollution that kills us

and the drugs that kill us

and I'm not saying that our culture kills us.

Lobotomy patients still have heartbeats.

I reject this culture.

I am not a revolutionary or a commentary or a tributary or a sanctuary

I AM LONELY!

So is everyone else!

So care!

Care about death and work and love and hope and courage and ambition and dreams!

You don't have to believe in people, just believe they're worth it.

And you tell me the other option.